The Habitat
Home
Share to PinterestBridal Party standing on stage in small hall during wedding ceremony
LifeCelebrations

The Most Commonly Asked Wedding Etiquette Questions

By Habitat Staff Writer
Share to PinterestBridal Party standing on stage in small hall during wedding ceremony
Advertisement

Your wedding is a once-in-a-lifetime event where you get to throw a fabulous party to celebrate a new union among friends and family. It’s the perfect time to honor and show off your romance with your partner, and although it's your day, you have a responsibility to create an enjoyable and comfortable atmosphere for your guests. There are many traditions that should be followed.

01

When should I send out save-the-dates and wedding invitations?

Share to PinterestA hand holds a floral “Save the Date” card featuring white roses and gold lettering, placed over a gray envelope on a dark wooden surface. Nearby are white lisianthus flowers, pale blue envelopes, and a wax seal with a leaf design.

Ideally, you should send out save-the-dates at least a year or so before the wedding. Give everyone enough time to take off and make the proper accommodations needed to attend your wedding. Invitations can go out about 3 to 4 months before the wedding. Just make sure that everyone has enough time to RVSP.

02

Do I send out an invite even if I know that person can’t attend?

Share to PinterestA spiral notebook with “INVITE LIST” written in blue ink sits on a mustard-yellow surface, listing five guests: Mom and Dad, Brother, Grandparents, Best Friend, and Aunt and Uncle. A pen and a cluster of small white flowers rest beside it.

Even if you know someone you love won’t be able to share the special day with you, it’s considered an honor and good etiquette to send them an invite anyways. It’s a sign that you adore them and want them to be there. They’ll appreciate it and might even use it as a memento of your special day.

03

Who do I need to give a plus one to?

Share to PinterestA bride in a white dress and flower crown hugs an older woman, while a groom in a vest and bowtie greets an older man with a handshake and shoulder pat. They are outdoors in a sunlit, festive setting with blurred guests in the background.

Weddings are expensive, so you don't have to give everyone a plus one. However, the proper etiquette is to invite the partner of those who are married or in a long-term relationship. You can extend a plus-one invitation to single guests as it could make them feel more comfortable at the wedding; however, it's not required.

Regardless of what you choose to do, be specific and strict. For example, if only married couples can bring their partner, stick to that no matter what. Don't make any exceptions. When you send out your invitations, be clear who you'd like to attend by adding both names to the invitation.

04

Who pays for what?

Share to PinterestA woman in a red-and-white striped dress browses a clothing rack filled with white wedding gowns on hangers. She reaches for a lace dress while standing in a bright, modern boutique with gold clothing racks.

Back in the day, the bride's family was responsible for paying for everything because women were considered financial burdens that were passed from one family to another.

Nowadays, it doesn't matter! It really depends on how the bride and the groom feel about the situation and their financial circumstances. It's completely okay for one side to pay for everything, and it is also okay for both parties to split the payment however they see fit.

05

Can we disinvite someone?

Share to PinterestTwo women stand facing each other outdoors. One woman, wearing a black-and-white striped dress, raises her hand with eyes closed and a displeased expression. The other woman, seen from behind, wears a black top with dark hair, partially obscured in shadow.

Although you technically can do this, it’s considered poor etiquette, so you should try to avoid doing so if it’s possible. We suggest that you simply don't spend time with them at your wedding, and with so many guests, it's really easy to avoid people you don't want to see.

If you really can’t stand to see their faces, then the proper etiquette is to tell them in person or through a phone call that you think they shouldn’t attend. If you do this, prepare for your friendship to end.

06

Do I have to invite a couple that invited me to their wedding?

Share to PinterestA crowd of guests is gathered on a lawn for an outdoor wedding ceremony. In the foreground, two champagne flutes and a decorative ring box rest on a small white table. String lights hang above, and a man in a suit faces the audience near a white house.

There isn’t any silent pact that says that you have to invite a couple that invited you to their wedding. The rule of thumb is to consider inviting couples that were married within recent years. However, if you attended their wedding more than a decade ago and you're not close with them anymore, you shouldn't worry too much.

07

Can we include registry information in the invitation?

Share to PinterestTwo wrapped wedding gifts sit on a light blue surface—one in gold paper with a cream ribbon and a “Happy Wedding” tag, the other smaller with a gold bow. A blank wish list card and a white rose boutonniere are placed beside them.

This is a hard no. While your guests will likely bring wedding presents, you don't want to pressure them or make it seem like giving a gift is a requirement for attending the wedding. Keep the invitation simple, and provide information about a registry at a later time or occasion.

08

Can I ask for cash?

Share to PinterestA plastic bride and groom cake topper stands surrounded by fanned-out U.S. dollar bills. The bride holds a small bouquet with white flowers and green leaves, and both figures wear formal wedding attire.

It’s considered poor form to ask outright for cash. While you can suggest it, asking for cash outright can offend some people. We highly recommend that you just put out the word quietly that you'd prefer cash because you're saving for a particular thing. You could further encourage cash by providing a very minimal registry.

09

Do I have to serve liquor at my wedding?

Share to PinterestA group of wedding guests clink glasses of white wine in a celebratory toast. The focus is on their hands and glasses, with blurred glimpses of formal attire and smiling faces in the background.

If you’re firmly against alcohol, you do not have to serve liquor at your wedding. This is more of a tradition rather than etiquette, so you don’t have to serve booze. You can always offer some type of alcohol ticket instead of a full bar, or you can opt-out of it entirely.

You should do whatever you’re most comfortable with. Your guests already love you and won’t hold the fact that there’s no alcohol at the wedding against you.

10

Can I ask guests not to take photos?

Share to PinterestA wedding photographer with long blonde hair and a white shirt holds a large camera up to her face, capturing a photo of the bridal party in the background. Bridesmaids in pink dresses and groomsmen in white shirts stand under a floral arch.

Almost everyone is glued to their phones nowadays, and it's easy for a guest to ruin a wedding photo if their phone is out. Don't be shy and let your guests know that you'd prefer to leave the photography to the professionals. Consider setting up a sign at the entrance that lets your guests know about your preferences. While it can be hard to enforce this, it is always okay to ask.

Share

Scroll Down

for the Next Article

Advertisement